The similarities in Nathan and Sophies births!

Weight: Nathan 8Lbs 4Ozs Sophie 8Lbs 4Ozs
Length: Nathan 21.75 Sophie 21.5
Time of Birth: Nathan 10:37 Sophie 9:22 (michigan time so they were only 15 mins. apart)
Date of Birth: Nathan 2/27/2007 Sophie 7/27/2008
Pushing Time: Nathan about 20 minutes Sophie about 20 minutes

Sophies Birth Story

I need to start by saying Sophies birth was surrounded by drama! In March of 2008 we got a notice on our front door from our landlord saying that he was selling the house we lived in and we had 30 days to move. Ricky and I had next to no money saved up and time was ticking. My family lives in Michigan and they were our only option for housing. Together we came up with the plan that Nathan and I would move to Michigan until Ricky could save up enough money to bring us home to another house or apartment. I moved with Nathan to my parents home in May 2008 and Ricky moved in with his mom and step dad. This was the toughest time in my short adult life, being away from the man you love and knowing he is missing Nathan and I so much. Being so far away put a strain on our relationship and we were always fighting about one thing or another. Time passed and being apart never got easier, Nathan was growing so much and learning words and I was getting bigger and bigger as my pregnancy was coming to a close. When my due date was about 3 weeks away I started doing everything I could think of to get labor started. I tried walking, evening primrose oil, castor oil, you name it I tried it! I had a weekly OB appointment at 39 weeks and they scheduled me to be induced at 40 weeks. I was SO ready to have this baby girl so I kept walking to see if I could just go into labor on my own. When I was 39 weeks 5 days pregnant my day went as usual nothing different or new went on that day and I went to bed around 10pm. At 2AM I woke up to a popping feeling and it jolted me awake. I went into the bathroom and thought maybe my bladder was full and I leaked a little but the rest of my water broke right there in the bathroom. I grabbed a towell and went into my moms room and woke her up. My mom already had her pink (of course) bag packed and her "cute hospital outfit" ready to go. I called the Dr. and they gave me the go ahead to proceed to Port Huron Hospital. After the call to the doctor I called Ricky in Tennessee and no one answered. After the phone calls I went and threw on some different clothes and mom and I hopped into the car and made our way to the hospital. I finally got a hold of Ricky in the car, thank God! My mom was playing a Cat Stevens CD in the car, don't ask me why because I had never even heard of him! We get to the hospital around 2:45AM and I am sent to triage and then I was checked in. My room was very nice and cozy. Well after a while I was put on pitocin to get the contractions going since I was not having any yet. I rested for a few hours waiting on things to happen. Around 7AM I started getting uncomfortable and began to ask for the epidural. When it was time for me to get the drugs it was shift change for the anesthesiologists. At a few minutes past 8AM the day shift anesthesiologist came into my room and got me all hooked up and I was out of pain!! At 9AM I was ready to push and at 9:22AM Sophie Grace Deakins made her appearance! I never thought anything would be as beautiful as Nathan was but Sophie was equally beautiful! Sophie was taken away and was cleaned up and has the cord cut off and was getting weighed and measured when the doctor showed me the placenta. I did not see the placenta after Nathan was born but I am glad I saw one in real life because it was amazing! Sophie Grace weighed in at 8 pounds and 4 ounces and was 21.5 inches long and had light brown hair and beautiful blue eyes!

Nathan's Birth Story

The miracle of my son's birth began with a routine doctors appointment on February 26th 2007. I went in to have a non stress test and to be checked for any effacement or dilation. Good news was I was at 2cm dilated, bad news was my blood pressure had skyrocketed to 189/100. My doctor was located in the physicians building of Stonecrest Medical Center in Smyrna, Tennessee so she let me know that sometime today or tomorrow I was going to have my baby. Since the doctors office was attached to the hospital I was allowed to walk myself to labor and delivery on the third floor. On my short walk over to L&D I made a few calls to my mom and Ricky and a few other people about the plan for me to be induced. I had already registered before hand so I just went right up to the 3rd floor and I was checked in. By 2pm I had a room and a lovely (ha ha) gown to wear. I was put on fetal monitors and hooked up to a blood pressure cuff which was set to go off every 10 minutes to closly monitor the BP situation. Around 3:30 in the afternoon Dr. Wesley sent the orders to start the oxytocin to get the labor going. From here on out it was a waiting game. I was hooked up to the IV and the drugs started flowing! I was started on the lowest dosage of oxytocin so nothing much was happening. I watched some TV, read a little and ate dinner. I finally fell asleep and every hour on the hour a nurse came in to up the oxy dosage. I woke up really early the morning of Tuesday February 27th to slight labor pains. I always wonder how long I was actually in labor because some say from the time you get labor inducing drugs you are in labor (which I slept through) but I do not think I was in labor until my water was broken. At 8:00am Dr. Wesley came in with her long and pointy instruments and let me know that she was going to break my water. Now I am getting excited because my son is going to make his appearance very soon! Since I had such a high dose of oxytocin and the water was broken things happened VERY fast from here on out. I started feeling some pain and I knew that I wanted an epidural. About 10 minutes later I am resting comfortably waiting until it is go time.About 35 minutes after I got the epidural a nurse came in to check how I was dilating, she said I was only at 3cm. I had been at 2cm for days and had been on the inducing drugs all night and now my water is broken so the info is sent to Dr. Wesley. The Dr. comes in and can't believe I have not changed at all so she rechecks me to be safe and lo and behold I am 10cm and ready to push! At a little after 9am I started the pushing and after about 5 pushes with time in between them Nathan Kendall Deakins was born at 9:22am. Nathan was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen in my life. He weighed in at 8 pounds 4 ounces and was 21.75 inches long. I can honestly say that the labor and delivery was wonderful. The stitches and healing and breast pain was rough afterwards but it was oh so worth every second of pain for my baby boy!

Things are looking up!

Things ARE looking up. I am getting a washer and dryer. The set is about 15 years old but as long as I don't have to leave my house and let the laundry pile up it will be fine. I guess the big man upstairs heard my prayers! I know you should not pray about "things" but it really is something you cant live without, especially when you have a baby and a toddler. Today is a better day. My mind is calm today and hopefully nothing will ruin that! The kids are less cranky today and are eating breakfast right now. I am hoping to get some housework done today. Our tiny 3 bedroom apartment is starting to get seriously cluttered. I have to clean out our pantry in order for me to get a washer and dryer in there. We don't have a "laundry room" but we do have a tiny pantry with the hookups in it. I don't care if the set is in my living room, i am going to be washing clothes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Bye for now!!

Money CAN buy happiness... aka RANT

Sometimes life has to be so hard. I have so much to be thankful for but I never seem happy. I have 2 wonderful and healthy kids. I have a roof over my head. For the most part we have food in the fridge and pantry. I should be grateful but I can't help being so sad all of the time. Ever since I graduated high school I have worked. I have had poor paying jobs and pretty good paying jobs. I loved the feeling of getting up in the morning and having a purpose for the day, making a paycheck and contributing to my family. I have to see Rickys face when we check our bank account to see that we don't have enough money. Yet again we have wasted away 8 grand from taxes. I could justify a few purchases and some money spent though. We paid 3 months in rent and bought a computer since ours is ready to go any day now. We didnt need our 42 inch plasma, even though we got a great deal on it. We didnt need to go out with friends and spend so much money, we didnt need to spend so much on Christmas or Nathans birthday or Valentines day. I always say we will do it different next year but I am sure we wont. Ricky and I really don't have that much in common. We fight quite a bit about stupid stuff. We have one piece of shit car and to be quite honest I don't think we will ever have anything nice ever. We don't have a washer and dryer. Clothes pile up and then I drive 35 minutes to Donelson to wash laundry with Rickys step mom. If I ever go anywhere I have 2 kids with me. Rickys work cut his hours, AGAIN. I am sure because of this we wont be able to make our rent next month. We have next to nothing to eat in our house yet I am STILL overweight. I hardly eat and I run around after kids all day and I am convinced I am going to be fat forever. I am probably larger than my father, which is sad since he is 6ft or taller and I am a mere 5 foot 5. I hate getting up in the morning knowing I am going to have to look at the same pile of laundry again, I wont have the house clean enough and when I do my tornado of a son will try his hardest to mess it up. I am starting to think everything is my fault. I don't have a job. If I did I really would be a happier person. I could buy a washer and dryer, I could put more food in the fridge, I could help pay rent. I guess it is always "woulda, coulda, shoulda" in my life. Everyday I think what my life would be like if I left Ricky and started my life over. I don't want to do that but I am not going to go without the things my family needs forever. I understand we dont have the money right now, but we never have the money. I don't want to do anything to keeps the kids away from their father but I can't live like this forever. All we need is 250 dollars so we can put a down payment on a set and then make a 50 dollar payment every month for 9 months. Is that SO much to ask? I love Ricky, really I do but it kills me to see 4 year olds in my family that get treated better than I do. I don't get a moment alone. I pee with a 2 year old watching me. I shop with 2 cranky kids. I can never go to the pool with the kids because I cant handle 2 kids at the pool by myself. Ricky never wants to do anything as a family. Right now my house is a mess, kids are screaming, I need to find something for dinner and Ricky is upstairs by himself playing on the computer. All I want to make me happy is to be able to relax for a minute, wash clothes in my OWN house, a date night without kids, a job, money, my REAL family back in Tennessee, for my best friend to be not so far away and maybe a diet pepsi... I know my problems are tiny compared to other people being laid off and losing their homes but right now they are big to me, so big I am never happy unless I am alone with my kids and they are being good! I know this is such a long rant but I don't ever talk about this to anyone and if I talk to Ricky we end up argueing and talking about splitting up. Goodbye for now. Until next mental breakdown!!!!!!!!!!!

kids, life and new things... been thinking

Wow today I realized just how much the kids are growing up. Nathan is learning more and more words everyday. Sophie is crawling and pulling up and cruising on the couch. I just stand back and watch the kids and I know how my mom must feel looking at her 5 kids and seeing me with 2 kids, one graduated high school, one about to graduate, one in high school and one about to be in high school. The time really does fly. It seems like yesterday we were living in Canada and playing in the snow and going to Tawas with the grandparents for the summer. This morning I actually started crying because Nate and Soph were sitting on the floor and PLAYING! Nathan was not trying to pile drive her head into the floor and Soph was smiling and laughing at him. Even though this was the first time they have interacted and Sophie did not end up hurt and crying it made me think about how they are going to grow up so fast. All this makes me realize that I need to get with it and go and do something with my life. I need to utilize the federal grants I have already been offered and go to school to show my kids that they can do something better in their lives than just graduating high school. Every day that passes I feel as if I have let my parents down somehow by not going to college, having 2 kids, not being married. Currently I am a stay at home mom and I know that it is the hardest job I have ever done. Being a mom does not compare to anything I have ever done in my life. I want to spend my time at home while the kids are little just like my mom did with all 5 of us. I know I am rambling on and on so I am going to go to bed. Tomorrow is another day and I think I am going to try and plan out my future as much as I can. I need to get the ball rolling so I can make my own money and be more independant for myself and my kids. I always wonder what would happen to us if something ever happened to Ricky. He is a smoker, overweight, has sleep apnea, and injuries from being in the Marine Corps. Again I am rambling and I am really going to bed now. I feel better now that I have written about all of this. More adventures tomorrow...

playdate with cousins..

Today, Ricky's mom brought over Nate and Soph's cousins Kayleigh and Jordan. When they got here we took the kids for a walk around the block and then came back to the house and let the kids eat some lunch. So we had a 4 year old, a 2 year old, a one year old, and a 7 month old running around my small apartment! Nathan was ok with everyone being here until he started getting tired and then he lost it. Nate started pushing Jordan down, pulling Kayleigh's hair and trying to choke his grandma Lillie. Right now the chaos has subsided Grandma and the cousins left and Nate and Soph are sleeping. When the kids wake up we will peobably eat and go for a walk again if it has not started raining yet. Today it is 78 degrees and partly cloudy. It is a bit hot for my taste but I am happy the kids are not stuck inside the house. They are so much better through the day when we can just get out and run around. Well the countdown is beginning for MiMi and Pappy's visit. They will be here April 8th- so they will be here in 29 days!!!